The P.O.S.H. Life (Pursuit of Strength & Health)

So you got her to go out with you and you are genuinely interested. How do you keep her attention and hungry for more? I found a great article at MyBrotha.com which can give you a few tips. (I can't spit my own knowledge everyday..gotta work!)

A lot of women don't mind the suave words and phrases you may use. Some may even be flattered by those words. But it takes more than a few chessy lines to keep her from wavering. Even more important, how do you handle getting her attention and keeping it for longer than a single day? The answers can be both complex and simple at the same time.

Now before you settle on using lame pickup lines that were probably worthless during your high school days, consider the fact that most women have been exposed to the game for a lot longer than they care to mention. There aren't many pickup lines women haven't heard before. If you want to reap the benefits of meeting and keeping a quality woman, try some of these techniques and take note of the differences in these -- and the ones you may currently use.


Track Star
Women love attention. But most do not wish to be feverishly chased into a corner where they feel trapped or smothered. There is a fine line between showing a woman an adequate amount of attention, and dishing out more than she can handle. Attention isn't some substance she can peel off in chunks and use for a later date. The amount you show her at any given moment should be calculated with care. After all, you're in this for a reason, right?

So stop running so fast. Those old clichés about "chasing the woman" and using the, "full-court press", are out-dated and overrated. Besides, men can never keep up with those reputations and this will be painfully evident soon after a woman accepts the invites and the chase settles down a bit.

Low-level Contact
For some reason, there is no in-between for guys. We either don't call the women we claim to be interested in, or we give new meaning to the term, "hotline". Phone calling should be kept to a minimum. That's right. Totally opposite from the traditional phone-blasts many men present, women look for sincere phone calls that show desire and thoughtfulness. Besides that, you have to remain somewhat of a challenge. If a woman expects you to call too often, you need to do exactly the opposite.

These phone calls or emails don't have to be 5-hour marathons, or 4-page soliloquies. Two quality phone calls during the week, is 99-times better than ten sorry ones over two days.

High-level Reception
Men are notorius for being the aggressors, and disappearing like ghosts when women try to reach them. While most women won't pursue men indefinitely, many will initiate telephone calls or emails if their interests have been piqued. The result should be a man who is available to answer those calls or messages from time to time. This means, if you are an extremely difficult person to get a hold of at any point in time, her attention-meter begins to swing towards the negative numbers. (In these instances, negative numbers are not good!)

In other words, be available. One of the first negative characteristics women tag to a man's persona, is his ability to show up. Of course, you don't have to be in every spot she expects to find you, but the harder it is for her to reach you, the easier it is for her to stop trying.

Support her Goals
It's not all about you. The sooner you learn this, the better. Your goal here is to be known as a man who listens and shows affectionate attention without being asked or coerced.

We're living during the times of the independent sista, so most women you meet will already have goals, aspirations, and dreams to strive for. Some may already be in the midst of realizing those dreams, and how you handle the reception of those dreams, is important for the future.

If you don't understand her desire to collect stamps, or open a Shetland pony farm, show an interest in the fact that she has dreams, even if you don't like what she's dreaming about.

Don't Do Anything
You got it. Meet with her, sit with her, stand at the counter in McDonald's with her, and do absolutely nothing. There's no need to go overboard in the impression department. There is nothing wrong with pointing out your talents every now and then, but don't worry about making earth-shattering revelations, or solving the world's problems when you meet.

Just be yourself enjoy the quality moments you have. There will be plenty of time to shine if you have her attention.
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So its Monday, and you knew I had to bring you the ignorance. Its dating week here at P.O.S.H. and I wanted to discuss how colorism affects your dating habits. It ain't 1953 and we are no longer riding at the back of the bus. However, many of us still subscribe to dating habits of the past.

I wanted to get to the heart of dating patterns we find ourselves trapped in and why we claim there are no "quality/good" folks around for us to date. Do you limit your pool by color? Is it subconscious or is it a preference so deep rooted that you didn't even realize you were doing it? Are we excluding quality candidates based on ex slave mentalities? I saw this quote on Happy Nappy Head by Roy Innis and it really made me think.

“I was one of the pioneers of the concept of Black is Beautiful. That we must be proud of our African ancestry. Unfortunately, the demon of self-depreciation has been the most difficult demon for Black Americans of all complexions to expel. Darker skinned Blacks like KanyeWest have had an even harder time accepting Blackness in themselves and in others. I wonder how much we have gained psychologically, since the bad old days of the 60’s, in our appreciation of our Blackness.”

I will be the first to admit. I used to subscribe to the title of this post. All of my boyfriends or guys I was interested in were light bright, paper bag test passing, "good hair" having, get my mamma and grand mamma's stamp of approval dudes. My family is from Tennessee, where it was believed back in the day that the lighter you were the easier you fit into society and were desirable. Colorism appears to be tied to where you live in America. In the Southern and Western areas of the country, folks still subscribe to the "If your Light your Right" theory of dating. I was even told by a family member "Don't marry any dark-skinned man, we won't babysit your monkey children." Wow! I was appalled, and this was sometime around 2003...not 1923.

Many black women have stated preferences for dating only light-skin men. There is this conception that men of lighter complexions will be more successful in the workplace (which equals stability and providing for a family), and they will have "pretty" children which is tied to the myths about good and bad hair. A poll I found online stated that women had a preference for dating light skinned men. Discussion on the generally stated that women generally were raised not to date darker skinned men or chose them as husband material but darker skinned men were perceived as better lovers in bed. (Wow, we still are on the Mandingo principle in 2008???)

Men how about you? I have heard black professional men discuss only dating medium to light skinned women. Darker skinned women at times can be seen as undesirable in work, social, and economic settings. Dating light skinned women is even ingrained in popular media. When is the last time you saw a dark skinned video chick? Nearly every girl in a video can check the light-skinned, other, or questionable box. Kanye West is even quoted as saying “If it wasn’t for race mixing there’d be no video girls. Me and most of our friends like mutts a lot. Yeah, in the hood they call ‘em mutts”.

You all remember the "Light-Skinned Girl Party" which was to be held in Detroit and women perceived as light skinned would get in for $5. Black men even seem to stray away from or have a preference for dating women with lighter complexions as they will have long and straight hair. It appears that Black men are only slowly coming around to women rocking their natural hair texture.

I even caught a glimpse of online dating ads. Most people referred to themselves as light or dark skinned, not just black. You don't see other nationalities referring to themselves by color even though each ethnicity has their own color issues to deal with.

To come back full circle. Does colorism affect your dating preferences? Do you stick to one range of color on the Black spectrum? Are you missing out on good candidates because of a societal idea placed in your head by your environment or family?

If so, I think we all need to take a hard look at our preferences and be a little more equal opportunity. We don't work in the big house or the field anymore and while racism does exist, we shall overcome.

Comments?
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Let me be the first to say, let the words of my mouth, be acceptable to thy sight. I had to say that because I ‘m getting ready to go to church like Choir Boy from “The Five Heartbeats.” My brothers of color, we exist in the perfect time and season to actually meet a woman of quality and substance. I don’t know if you know this, but we are currently in a period of economic distress. The job market is so horrific, it reminds me of the set of Good Times (ain’t we lucky we got em, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom). You would think that this hardship will bring out some of the women we know as gold diggers. Wrong. There is no gold even for them to dig. A person might be in a house, but he might be one month away from foreclosure or sitting on a sub prime mortgage. Suddenly New Edition’s,” Can You Stand the Rain” is like the Gospel now.

Despite my commentary, now is the time to really meet someone quality. The way things are with the economy, employment, and the environment, people are forced to do things that don’t cost a lot of money and actually requires conversation as part of the date. This beats stuffing chardonnay and surf and turf in your mouth. Grant it some folk’s ain’t gonna make it. Some of our female counterparts have champagne taste, but Kool-Aid salary. Also some people do not know how to operate in the down economy. They were so used to just spending money and not having to worry about anything. Alas, now everyone has to be creative.

This is the primetime for a cheap brother with an imagination to “come up.” If you’re that dude, then my brother, suddenly you’re “romantic.” I mean anybody who can cook right now is a hot commodity. I got the oven if you got the coupons!

Sidebar: Here is what I wonder. Why haven’t we seen the resurgence of the house party? I mean people are broke and still trying to VIP it all over the town. That is a wrap for me. The only bottle service I’m trying to get is at the “batcave.” Then again, if everybody is caught up in sub prime mortgage crisis, there are no houses to host parties. Forget Facebook! We need a house party network!

Okay I’m back. So to bring quality women into your life, I offer these things.

• Does she do the little things?

Actions speak louder than words. Does she surprise you with your favorite ice cream or candy? What about buying you little thoughtful gifts? Grant it she may be I-n-d-e-p-e-n-d-e-n-t, but she should also know r-e-c-i-p-r-o-c-i-t-y.

If you see yourself putting more into the relationship than you're getting out of it, it's time to ask yourself some serious questions.

• Complete personality

Look to see if she's sincere, honest, reliable, responsible and relentless. The more of these qualities your woman has, the smaller the chances of her being the next contestant for the “I used to know her” list. But if your woman lacks any of these characteristics, then…to the left, to the left.

Remember gentlemen, the word for the rest of 2008 is “quality.” Let me know your success stories.
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What do Black men love about Black women? I started off doing a post to make everyone feel all warm and fuzzy. I googled "why black men love black women?" I thought I would find a poll, or survey I could quickly post. What did I find......some madness.

I am not against interracial dating. I just wonder what happened to Black Love? I searched page after page on Google and came up with ads like Black Man/White Woman, White Girls love Black Men, Black Women/White Man, Its so hard dating a black man/woman.......

WHERE WERE THE SITES ABOUT US LOVING EACH OTHER?

Is this why the divorce rates are so high? Is that why we have so many problematic relationships with each other? Interracial couples didn't become the norm until after segregation. That was only 40+ years ago!!! Where did the love go in 40 years folks??? Where did the respect and cultivation of black love go? Heck I had to search high and low just to find this photo!

I know that its a free love movement going on out there and you can't help who you love. But when did we stop loving each other black people?

Maybe we can start here.

Black men what do you love about black women?

Black women what do you love about black men?

No hate .....only love.
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I'm a man of color "blessed" with the metabolism of a hyperactive 8 year old. I am 5'11" and weigh about 185-188 lbs. I lift on a regular basis (4-5 times per week), but I used to have a problem gaining weight. Despite my athletic years playing football, soccer, baseball, and track I have always had the slender, athletic look. If you haven’t observed, black men come in different shapes, sizes, and colors. So as I prepare to train to compete in triathlons, I would like to bulk up at least 15 pounds

Generally to gain weight, you need more of everything, more meat, milk, starches, fruits and vegetables. Temper all this with some added fats, oils and sweets. Increasing your intake of junk foods and greasy foods is not a good way to gain weight. Junk foods usually contain unhealthy trans fats or saturated fats. Even though you need to increase your calorie consumption to gain weight, those calories should come from foods that are good for you.

Healthy fats include fatty acids sources like tuna, salmon, flax, and walnuts. Good sources of protein include lean meats, fish, poultry, nuts, seeds and legumes. Healthy carbohydrate sources include fruits, vegetables and whole grains. It may be easier to eat five or six smaller meals per day rather than eating three large meals, especially if you are not used to eating much at one sitting. Protein powders and nutritional supplement drinks such as Carnation, Boost, Ensure, or a shake from Smoothie King can be added as in-between meal snacks if you still need more calories. Some protein powders are flavored and only need added water and some others can be blended with your choice of juice or milk to improve the taste.

Use these tips and tools to help gain weight.

1. Add healthy calories to breakfast with an extra slice of whole-grain toast and peanut butter.

2. Mid-morning and afternoon snacks should be nutritious, not junk. Trail mixes contain healthy nuts, dried fruits and can add healthy calories to your diet.

3. Don't add calories to your meals by choosing unhealthy fried foods such as french fries, chicken nuggets and fish sticks. Choose healthy foods such as baked potatoes, baked chicken and fish; just make your portions a bit bigger.

4. Keep your meals balanced. One meal should have a healthy protein source such as fish, low fat meat, chicken or legumes plus two or three servings of vegetables. Green vegetables add lots of vitamins, while starchy potatoes and corn add extra calories.

5. Drink healthy beverages such as milk and fruit juices to add calories. Don't choose sugary sodas, which only add calories and no nutrition.

6. Design a weight training program that compliments weight training
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I stumbled on a rumored report that Keyshia Cole asked Young Jeezy to marry her and Jeezy declined. He cited the reason for his denial was his focus on his career and making money. I have heard from a few guys that women need to step up and get their holler game together since this is no longer 1950 (this is an entirely different post for another day). Keyshia took it one step further by proposing to her boo. (I don't know if I could take it that far).

It seems to me that Black couples are the first to site career goals and timing as the reason why we can't settle down. It has been my experience that other nationalities are interested in building with each other. They will start off with $100 and a dream while we can't marry until our paper is right. Are we missing out on great opportunities?


I began to wonder what are the reasons why a man won't commit to marrying a woman. If they have been dating for a long time, why do people waste time. If they aren't marriage material why are you seriously dating them. I found this Article at Black Voices a few days ago which cites a few reasons why men won't commit to marriage.



10. Options (other women) - With so many women out there, sometimes it can be difficult to settle down. Like much of the world, women outnumber men and in the black community, the disparity is even more pronounced. Sometimes guys just want to "sow their wild oats."

9. Financial issues - Money can play a large role in a relationship as two people start sharing their income. When you realize that the girl of your dreams can't keep a hold of her pocket book and she's dragging you down in the process, it becomes hard to imagine a future together.

8. The family from hell - When expectations don't mesh between the man and the woman's family, sparks can fly creating disastrous situations.

7. Insecurity/trust - Sometimes relationships can have trust issues and it makes it impossible to whole-heartedly be with someone, knowing the may lie or have cheated. The idea of his future wife with someone else can haunt a man.

6. Change in lifestyle- There are certain guys who don't want to get married simply because they like their care-free lifestyle. They don't want to compromise, they avoid responsibility and they cling to their personal space. For these men, a woman has to be pretty convincing in order to change their ways

5. She already has kids - For some men, when a woman has children already, there may be a feeling that the they will never be his. They may turn away from raising another man's offspring for the sheer fact that she still has that connection to the children's father.

4. Geography -She may want to live in one area while he wants to live in another. He may get a job out of town that could be full of possibilities and she may be on the fast track in her own field. Simple things like geography can be a relationship killer for men when compromise is out of the question.

3. Social class or status - Your girl may have more money than you. Plain and simple, it can be difficult for some men to maintain relationships knowing that they aren't the primary breadwinners. This can create insecurity and actually work to emasculate some men as they may be constantly reminded by their situation or even their girl that she does in fact make more than him.

2. They may not be the right person - A relationship can sputter and yet reluctantly continue despite a bevy of problems and when the idea of marriage comes up, those flaws may become painfully apparent.

1. Divorce/Parents Never Married - Children learn what they see and if they have no role models to emulate, or if their parents weren't married, it may not be normal to them. Some men may have seen their parents go through a nasty divorce and consciously or unconsciously may fear marriage and the pain it may cause.

Thoughts? Comments?

Ladies what has been your experience?

Fellas got any more thoughts or want to add to the discussion?

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In my last post I'm Not Fat, I'm Thick: What Black Men Are Saying, I briefly glossed over Buffy the Body, modern day video vixen. As soon as I saw her picture I was reminded of Saartjie Baartman: The Hottentot Venus. Baartman lived during Dutch colonization in South Africa. Whites, unfamiliar with the bodies of African women developed stories and tall tales regarding the "large backsides", sexual organs, and sexuality of African women.


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"Gimme a sista, can't resist her, red beans and rice didn't miss her."

Ok folks, its time for me to get gangsta and call a few people out. You knew it was coming. I have been talking to a few of my sistas about obtaining a healthy weight. Many of you are interested. But, I have received this response. "Girl, I am not fat, I am thick. Black men love a thick woman." Ladies....please wake up and smell the grease....you are FAT!! I can understand this debate. I used to be one of those girls who smiled when a dude called me thick. Heck, I even grinned a little and batted my eyes, and picked up another piece of bacon (not turkey bacon mind you). I felt as though if it ain't broken why fix it.

The truth is I was broken. I went to the doctor a few months back complaining of stress and fatigue. My physician's first response was you need to lose about 40 pounds so you will feel better. Right now you are putting stress on your heart, joints, muscles, and organs by carrying extra weight. "But, doctor I am just a little overweight I am fine." Clearly, I was wrong.



I believe that many of the statistics about black women (70% are overweight and 40% are obese) directly correlate to the thick v. fat debate. Because we refuse to accept that we are fat, we are plagued by early deaths and diseases like diabetes, heart disease, and high blood pressure. Heart disease doesn't differentiate ladies. If you are overweight it will kill you just the same as someone who is obese. The longer you lie to yourself is one year off your life where you could spend time with family, friends, and loved ones.

Women, don't let the stereotypical discussions regarding the thick sista play you. While women shouldn't worry about a man's opinion, the truth of the matter is we do. Your reading this article right now because your are curious. I see you!! The reality is the line between fat v. thick is blurred. However based upon health standards (BMI, calories burned at rest etc), many of you calling yourselves thick are really fat. Since thick is terminology started by men, I asked a few brothers their opinions on the situation.

Andre (name changed) states, "Black women really get thick v. fat confused....sometimes you can have too much of a good thing. Many Black women are in denial and are fat but refuse to see the real deal because they can hide under the cloak of 'thickness'. No, sweetie, you are fat and we will appreciate you more if you lose some weight."

Kevin (name changed) states, "Fat depends on height, proportion, and many other factors, there is not one indicator. Check your BMI (Body Mass Index) If it reads overweight, or obese that might be an indicator that you need to hit the gym.!"

Shane (name changed) states, "Thick to me means, no fat rolls, I want my lady toned. Beyonce is thick, Buffy the Body is thick, but each of these women is a Snickers away from being fat."

William (name changed) states, "I want a little meat on her bones, I don't like super skinny women. When I say a little meat I want a healthy weight on her. If we are dating, I want her around for awhile so I am concerned about her health."

Robert (name changed) states, " I feel as though, women don't understand. If you hit the gym, that's sexy. Many women who call themselves thick have never been to the gym. If you are thick and hit the gym...great! If not, go pick up those sneakers. We like imagining you hitting that treadmill and enjoy the benefits from when you do!"

What it seems like ladies is the men are saying. They are ok with you being thick. However, they seem to be more interested in a healthy partner. So don't blend the line of thick and fat. Call a spade a spade. Ladies, I say in love. Hit the gym, get your BMI, have a fit test taken, stop listening to what you think men want. Listen to your body, worry about your health and the longevity of your life. When you care about your body and love yourself that healthy glow will shine. You will have to beat them off with a stick.

Stay tuned for Part 2 of I'm Not Fat, I'm Thick: Images in the Media

Ladies, what do you think?

Men, do you agree?

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Warning: Chauncey is about to get sarcastic.

So, the sound track for the segment on Black Men should have been Marvin Gaye’s “Inner City Blues”. Ya’ll know the line: “Makes me wanna Holla throw up both my hands, yeah! make me wanna throw up my hands.” I felt from the division of the issues that Black men was not going to fair well. Wednesday night: Black Women and Family, how nice of them to link Black women and family together in one night.

Baby Jesus knows we can’t spend too much time on Black women and surely we can’t be expected to pull much from the Black family in about an hour; but the Black man. Heck yeah, give him all night to pick out prison stats, college enrollment stats, absentee father stats, high school drop out stats, fatherless boys stats, hmmm oh yeah, drug use and drug career stats. Let me crunch the stats, hmm, 2a + (1-3) - 7(b) - 12 (4 + 8- ab + bc = lawd jayzus.

Warning: Chauncey is about to get serious.

It is quite a task to try to put content under the title of “ Black in America.” I think O’Brien did a great job of talking to a wide range of people and some of the stories were truly touching. She did a reasonable job of incorporating the negative things because America need to see that side of reality. However, I do think some form of balance should have been used along with more substantial discussions about solutions.

The one thing that I thought could really just be gone forever and I wouldn’t shed a tear was that poet dude. I love arts and a major supporter of it, but the spoken word brother was killing me. He was annoying because he seemed to take away from the seriousness of the presentation. .

This episode was more depressing for me than the previous one because it just reminded me of all of the problems that face our community. We were presented (once again) with the crack epidemic, criminality, lack of job opportunities, discrimination, prison and on and on. So many young black men become resigned to a fate that they are doomed to a life of crime, violence and drugs. Many of them will die in prison.

Good stuff CNN.

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I was watching CNN's Black in America tonight. Several things were disturbing to me in this documentary. However the most glaring, due to my writings for P.O.S.H., was the health disparity experienced by Blacks in America. There are several things I came to realize regarding African- Americans and being healthy like our white counter-parts. We are fighting a war with few foot-soldiers. Health is probably the topic we as a community are least educated about. We also tend to gloss over the topic and often times are not a part of the solution.

How do we close the gap? I watched a woman during the program speaking about her trip to find a tomato in Harlem taking an hour. One whole hour for produce!! This is inconceivable in my world.
Access to fresh fruits and vegetables is a vicious cycle for numerous reasons. Large grocery stores will not service the black community for various reasons from crime, lower income patrons, and lower revenue for the food chain. The lack of large chain grocery stores leads to smaller stores supplying food to our communities. Which equals mark up. If produce is expensive for me, imagine how expensive it is in the inner community. These small stores only stock non perishable goods where they can see return on their inventory. Produce, fruits and vegetables spoil, especially if no one is there to buy them.

Here in Las Vegas an initiative was taken to bring a major grocery store to the inner city. One will open in the heart of North Las Vegas in the next few weeks, bringing healthy food to the community.

Lack of education. Many of you reading this blog have given P.O.S.H. e-high fives and kudos for providing you information about health and fitness that you were not aware of before. We are all products of our environments. The reality is the Black environment is not one of health whether you are rich or poor. Imagine the health education disparity in our urban hubs if YOU are unaware of how to live a healthy life. Most Blacks have no idea that it takes good eating habits and exercise to live longer and be healthy.

Exercise- you and I can go to the gym. Most of you reading this post have a gym membership and don't use it. There are no gyms in the inner city. But there are community centers. I was at a North Las Vegas community center this weekend for a health fair. Treadmills sat empty, weight machines were quiet. However, the community center by my house is cracking 24/7 in a white neighborhood. You have to sign a list and can only use a machine for 20 minutes. This problem is two fold. Black people are unaware of the importance of exercise to sustain a healthy life and many people are unaware of programs, facilities, and plans to live healthy lives.

What do we do?

Step 1. Educate yourself. By reading P.O.S.H. you are taking a stand. So keep going and keep learning!! Take what you read here and expound on it!!
Step 2. Implement what you learn. Don't just read about it be about it!
Step 3. Be a testament. Pass your knowledge on to your friends and family. Force those around you to see the benefits of healthy living. The thing I have realized is the more weight I lose and the more healthy I become, it shows!! People are interested in my secret and I am more than happy to give it. You would be surprised how little we know about this topic.

If we are able to pass on our knowledge things in our community will change. Its all about supply and demand. If we demand produce, stores must supply these goods. If we demand gyms or exercise facilities like the YMCA or community centers, they must be built! If we are silent ....we remain statistics.

We all know it takes a village. But the journey begins with you.

What are your thoughts about this topic and how will you participate in changing health in the Black community? How did you feel we were portrayed in the CNN documentary? Read More......

Studies show that listening to music has a positive effect on your work out. Those who listened to music while working out have increased motivation and are distracted from the fatigue that work outs bring.

Dr. Costas Karageorghis, an associate professor of sport psychology at Brunel University in England, has studied the effects music has on exercise for years. Karageorghis states that a song's tempo should be about 120 to 140 beats-per-minute. These BPMs mirror the average person’s heart rate during a routine workout. For example, he states that “Push It” by Salt-N-Pepa and “Drop It Like It’s Hot” by Snoop Dogg are around that range, as is the dance remix of “Umbrella” by Rihanna (so maybe the pop star was onto something).

For a stroll walker going at a pace of around 3 miles an hour, a remixed track has a count of 115 to 118 B.P.M.; for a power walker going 4.5 m.p.h., the count is 137 to 139 B.P.M., while the B.P.M. for a runner elevates to 147 to 160.

Additionally, a 2005 study showed that participants who listened to music while walking lost more and had a greater reduction in body fat than those who did not include music in their work out.

"The more unfit you are, the more difficult exercise is," "Music helps break the monotony of exercise and provide a distraction from the physical exertion."

Mix up your playlist - if you keep playing the same tunes, pretty soon you will find your motivation dropping because your mind will tune out the muisc.

So get out that iPod and lets get crackin!!

My Current Playlist - Right now these babies are in heavy rotation on my iPod. I currently play songs that keep me pumped and motivated to continue hitting the treadmill.

Honorable Mention

Push it - Rick Ross
Stunna Shades - The Federation
Stronger - Kanye West

Top 10

10. PYT Michael Jackson
9. Damaged - Danity Kane
8. Go Hard or Go Home - E 40
7. Spaz - N.E.R.D.
6. Spotlight - Jennifer Hudson
5. International Swagger - Glow in the Dark Mixtape ( N.E.R.D. and Kanye)
4. Ms. New Booty - Bubba Sparks
3. Got Money - Lil Wayne
2. Big Boi - Kryptonite
1. Fuego - Pit Bull

What is your playlist? Let P.O.S.H. know so we can all mix it up and stay motivated!! Read More......

Al Green asked a great question, “How can you mend a broken heart?” In reality…you really can’t, you simply adjust. As we exist in the heart of summer, I am hearing tales of my fellow brothers getting the pink slip in the realm of dating and relationships. The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in the areas of comfort of convenience, but how well he can handle a break up.

There are many articles out there about what to do when the woman you thought was Ms. Right breaks your heart, with standard advice like get up off your feet, meet new people ... The truth is that a breakup is often a painful and dreadful experience. It’s the pain that has no name. There is no easy solution because the only remedy is time.

In my lifetime I've seen too many examples of perfectly rational men losing their minds when their girlfriends, boos, or significant other leave them simply because they feel they don't have control over their lives anymore.

When a woman drops the pink slip on you, it is really over. You may feel the need to panic and beg for her back. Maybe you’ll do anything to make things right. But no matter how you try, you can't get her back or get back to the way things used to be. Getting the woman of your past out of your present is a mental and emotional challenge of the first order.

As men we get stuck in limbo with the idea that there might be a chance of getting back together with the ex. The result of such a belief is a double-edged rejection sword. First comes the initial sting originating from the breakup itself; then comes the heartbreaking hope that she will return; then finally the eventual realization that she is gone for good.

All this pain could be kept short and sweet if we learn to accept the decision made by your ex. By waiting around and hoping, any man is trapping himself in an endless circle of torture.

There's only one thing left for you to do: Forget her. I know it's not as easy as it sounds, but with these five things, you'll forget her and pick up the pieces of your shattered heart -- and manhood -- in no time.

1- Get closure

It's essential to definitively end any hopes of reconciliation between the two of you. And if you can't get that into your head, she owes you the courtesy of it crystal clear. She needs to tell you: "I never loved you. I don't love you now. We'll never get back together." After some prodding, she'll probably do it, just to get rid of you. It provides what therapists call "closure." And you can begin to heal.

2- Silence is Golden

After the relationship reaches finality, you have to break off contact or you will go mad. Don't beg or cry. Don't drunk-dial. Don't write her an e-mail. Don’t show up at her house or apartment. Don’t text her. Don't send flowers. Don't send letters or cards. Don't jump to answer her e-mail or phone calls. And definitely don't go out of your way for her. She no longer deserves preferential treatment.

She will find you if she wants to. And even if you can talk your way back into her arms, it's only a temporary reprieve. She already knows you want her back, and she doesn't care. Take that as a sign. She will try to text you or maybe Gchat you to start small talk. It’s a trap. As soon as you engage in a conversation, rest assured that she will try her best to end the conversation quickly and swift.

If you feel for the sake of sanity it is wise to send her a letter. Keep it short, simple, and sweet. Feel free to use the following template.

Dear (Insert Name),

I write this letter to thank you for all that you have been to me. I thank you for all that you have been in my life and for the many ways you have served and supported me. We have had many great times together and it is apparent that this relationship no longer serves us and what we desire. Good luck with your future endeavors. Take care.

3- Avoid her friends & the places she hangs

Women are very territorial. If I’m lying then I’m flying. Don't venture into her territory. You won't be welcome. Find new places to hang out and make new friends, if necessary. If any of your friends insist on maintaining contact with her, you may have to shut them out, too -- at least temporarily. After some time has passed, you should go back to living normally, and that means hanging out at these places and reconnecting with mutual friends.

4- Hang out with the fellas

It’s a part of life. A little bit of male camaraderie can go a long way towards getting your head straight. This is your saving grace. Back in the day, the men used to sit around the house, pop in the old school songs, and laugh, joke, and talk about the mysteries of life and bad relationships.

5- File thirteen anything that reminds you of her

You don't have to burn it all, but definitely get pictures, gifts, clothing, letters, and e-mail out your line of vision. Save your sanity. If you find it difficult, this means that you can't let go and you're still hoping for her to return to you. Guess what my brother…she’s not returning. Believe me, once you meet another woman, all those pictures of your ex will become meaningless. Invest in a Sony Playstation 3, secure a personal trainer, and start drafting plans for Operation: Swagger Back.

Disclosure: All jokes aside, relationships end for various and different reasons. When it’s over, just remember to have a sense of dignity, don’t do anything crazy, and allow your mind, soul, and body to heal.

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CocoaDiva here. I was just pondering on love and relationships and thought of the Cinderella syndrome. Why is it we as women are always waiting on our white knight to show up, make our lives complete, and sweep US off our feet. We always think we have found "the one" and a year or several years later we realize we just had magic dust in our eyes. Why are we so afraid of taking charge of our own relationships?

There is no such thing as the Prince Charming complex. Men aren't sitting around waiting for that right one, being patient, faithful, and dilligent. They are out in the streets with wives, girlfriends, and others. Why is there no complex like this for men? Men get to sow oats while we get to sit at home and wait for the oats to make oatmeal.

I was at a book club meeting this weekend and I posed the question when does a man realize that he has found that ONE aka "Princess Charming"? Why is it that men proclaim they have found her but then cheat on her, abuse her, or neglect her. I especially can't understand the cheat on portion. When is ONE woman enough to satisfy a man's needs?

Why is it in our society committment has become a dirty word? Why is there that half of all marriages end in divorce statistics? Were our mothers less afraid of meeting disaster in marriage. Why do we have to worry about the down-low brother?

Does a man ever get permanently swept off his feet in a magical Cinderalla moment?
Is there such thing as a down-low sistah that men have to worry about? On that note what are the male pit-falls to modern dating?

Speak now if your tired of kissing frogs. (Or men if you have your answer). Read More......

Ladies we have all complained about not being satisfied by a partner and most of us have faked an orgasm. Why do we do it?

Shayla (name changed) reports being really happy with her boyfriend. He loves her, is attentive, they laugh for hours on end, and he treats her better than any man she previously dated. However, she reports repeatedly faking orgasms. She says "Sometimes I get really close to climax, but most times he just can't take me there....So I fake it."

Shayla isnt alone. Statistics show that only approximately 30% of women can achieve an orgasm through intercourse alone. According to the 2000 Orgasm Survey (who knew they conducted an Orgasm Study??), 72 percent of women have faked at least once in their current or most recent relationship, and 55 percent of men say they can tell when their partner's faking. Guess what ladies, sometimes that Oscar winning performance didn't wow the crowd. The guys are on to you.

Most women require some clitoral stimulation to achieve the big O. Many sex positions do not lead to proper clitoral stimulation which prevents us from reaching climax. The number one reason women report for faking an orgasm is concern for the male ego. Well, you are hurting his ego when you fake it as well. It would suck for me to learn a job I thought I was great at....I really did a mediocre job.

I asked Shayla if she talks to her partner. Does she tell him what turns her on or when things feel just right? She replied, "I don't want to seem whorish or extra dirty, plus shouldn't he be able to figure it out?" The answer to this question is NO.

Ladies, a man isn't responsible for your orgasm. We are all take charge kind of girls. We dictate our own paths in life and go for what we want. What makes the bedroom any different? When you first started sexin your new boo....didn't you have to learn his body and find out what makes him tick? Honey, he has to do the same thing for you.

Every woman is not the same. He may be working on what got his last conquest off. That may have worked for her....but does nothing for you. If you play along then you are letting the previous woman rob you of your fun and good times. Every time you fake it your cheating yourself.

Here are some tips to owning your O.

1. Learn your body - many of us have been told that sex is dirty or wrong. This attitude leads many women to faking an orgasm because they don't really know what takes them to the mountain top. If you are sexually active, there is nothing wrong with a little self -exploration. Go buy a toy or just spend some time figuring out how you like to be touched and where. What kind of pressure do you like and when? How do you expect him to know if you have no clue yourself?

2. Speak up - sex is supposed to be fun! If he is doing something right let him know! That way he knows which actions to repeat. Let him know you like how it feels. If he is missing the mark you can gently guide him without being a dictator. Its so easy to say ..."I love it when you....." Or make it a scavenger hunt. Bet him he can't find your spot. Imagine the prize both of you get when he finds it.

3. Talk about sex when you aren't having sex - Ask questions and keep learning more about each other. Tell each other your fantasies and be willing to explore them, within reason. Opening and maintaining these communication lines will make you both more comfortable about the subject. Talking can also serve to build excitement as prolonged foreplay.

4. Remember everyone can't have a vaginal orgasm - that means more foreplay. Yay! Learn positions to get clitoral stimulation. Don't expect to get an orgasm just by intercourse alone. Tell him you like clitoral stimulation. Remember communication is key.

5. Enjoy the ride - turn off your expectations. Don't look for your O just let it come to you. If your brain is focused on finding it you miss the forest for the trees. Just have fun....if not why are you there.

6. Be an active participant - the starfish move is played. If you just lay there and don't take charge of your O its your fault too. If you don't like position A then switch it to position B. Trust us he won't mind.

7. Don't wait - The longer you wait and the more orgasms you fake the bigger the issues become. The longer you go without confronting and handling them, the bigger they become. Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the leading causes of couples splitting up. The number one reason for sexual dissatisfaction is lack of communication. Forgoing communication and opting to simply fake it will only widen the gap between you two and ultimately ruin the relationship.

8. Sex study sessions- men are flooded with flicks, stories from their friends, and images on television that tell them how we achieve orgasms. We all know that most of those images are not real. Many many will study sports stats or work stats but never know the ins and outs of a female orgasm. Both women and men should take every opportunity to become students of sex together. Not only is it very sexy to learn together, you will both benefit from it greatly in the long run.

Ladies ....here is to never faking an orgasm again. You and your partner will both thank you for it. Read More......

10. There is an easy way to lose weight- Nothing could be further from the truth. Fines have been levied against diet pills that claim to have the quick fix. There is no magic fix. Hit the gym and retrain your mind and eating habits.

9. If you stop exercising, your muscles will turn to fat- Muscle tissue and fat tissue are completely different. If you stop exercising, your muscle will become smaller and perhaps atrophy. You'll gain weight only if you keep eating the way you were when you were exercising.

8. If you don't have time workout 30 to 90 minutes a day, you shouldn't bother- The truth is, anything you can do will be beneficial. Studies have shown that even splitting up those 30 minutes into 10-minute segments is good for you.

7. Weightlifting makes women bulky- Its not true unless your are popping steroids.

6. Workouts must be intense to burn fat- Actually, the body burns fat as efficiently when you do low- to moderate- intensity workouts. Unfortunately, though, it takes longer to burn calories

5. Stretching isn't important because it won't make you thinner- Most people skip flexibility training because they think it doesn't have a direct impact on their fitness. But if you think about the fact that without proper stretching you could become injured, thus missing many workouts, it's vital.

4. Carbs make you fat - When you cut carbs you lose water weight. Eating carbohydrates makes you fat. Cutting carbs from your diet may have short-term weight loss benefits due to water loss from a decrease in carbohydrate stores, but eating carbs in moderation does not directly lead to weight gain. The body uses carbs for energy, and going too long without them can cause lethargy.

3 Drink eight, 8-oz. glasses of water per day. You should replace water lost through breathing, excrement and sweating each day - but that doesn't necessarily total 64 ounces of water. It's hard to measure the exact amount of water you have consumed daily in food and drink, but if your urine is pale yellow, you're doing a good job. If it's a darker yellow, drink more H2O.

2. Brown grain products are whole grain products. Brown dyes and additives can give foods the deceiving appearance of whole grain. Read labels to be sure a food is whole grain, and try to get three-ounce equivalents of whole grains per day to reduce the risk of heart disease, diabetes, and stroke.

1. Crunches will burn fat off your abs - Change your eating habits and hit a treadmill. and You could have abs like Schwarzenegger but if you have a layer of body fat over them you will never see them

Got anymore Weightloss Myths? Work out questions let us know! Read More......

Its time to get real kids and stop playing patti-cake with each other's emotions because we are too scared to confront reality. I have noticed that most of my white counter parts have settled down and find a mate. Heck some of them are on their second child. However, most of my friends are just now getting married or talking about being serious with someone. Why is relationship a dirty word for Black folks? I think if we started thinking more about WE instead of ME the black family would be in a better state.

Here are my ideas for all of us to begin having better interactions with the opposite sex.

1. Be Honest!! - If you don't want a relationship with someone - state that up front. Its alright to date but be cognizant that you are playing with people's emotions. If you do want a relationship, build with that person and learn more about them so you get past the honeymoon stage. I have never understood playing the field. How can you really learn about that special person when you are playing around with bench warmers? When you find someone that may be worth it Carpe Diem - before someone else does...and you are alone. See below - it ain't all about you.

2. Grow up - Recognize that Golden Rule you learned in Sunday school. Do unto others....etc. You don't want to get played or hurt. Be courteous and act how you would want others to treat you. Kama is a jealous broad and she will get you when you least expect it.

3. It ain't all about you - it takes two to tango. Your swagger hooked them...now what. Start trying to build things with people. Learn about a person and if they can fit into your plan. Not your superficial plan but your life long stability plan. If it don't fit you must acquit!! Cheesy I know. Put it this way - every day you string along someone because its comfortable is another day you miss out on finding the one who really fits in your puzzle. No one wins.

4. Throw away your lists - we miss out on good people because they don't have XYZ. Recognize these are wants most of the time and not needs. She may be fly and have body for days - but is she supportive in your time of need? He has a fly resume, but does he have bad credit? Do they go to church? Get down to the nitty gritty about what really makes you happy and what will be important to you with this person 50 years from now.

5. Talk it out - If things aren't going how you like. Communicate!! A closed mouth will never get fed. Please don't resort to cheating. It never helps anyone and leaves scars which even the biggest band-aid can't fix.

6. Expand your circle- You will never meet anyone hanging with your same friends, in the same places, on the same nights. Try something new and just go to hang out. You will be surprised who you meet.

7. Wait before you jump into sex- Why? diseases are killing our community. Also, sex complicates situations and clouds your judgment. Wait until you figure out if you can stand them and you know you want them in your life. Random kids and broken hearts are leftovers you could do without.

8. Quit complaining - Stereo types are so 1994. Every woman isn't a gold digger and every man isn't a dog. If you seek you shall find. You get what you attract. Many women want to build with a man and aren't in it just for the resume alone....just like many men are looking to settle down with one woman. If your picking up shallow chicks....you might not be selecting women based on superficial qualifiers. If you keep dating do wrong men...evaluate your own strength and if your letting your self be stepped on. Evaluate your past relationships. If you aren't liking what you find...change what you put out there.

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7. Smoothies with Whey Protein- I may have one for lunch or after my gym work out! GREAT way to get my protein in!!
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We at P.O.S.H are extremely pleased with the responses we have received with our fitness challenge. For those who have not signed up, its not too late! Email us at poshlifeposhstyle@gmail.com and sign up today!

In order to keep our challengers motivated, I've decided to put together a few weight loss tips to help each challenger maximize their weight loss.

1. Aerobic exercise is great, but.....
For maximum weight loss you want to incorporate strength training into your program. The reality is this, our bodies burn 60-80% of the calories we ingest while sitting on our baddunks. That's right...the vast majority of the calories you burn come from you sitting on the couch watching Flavor of Love and General Hospital. Does this mean exercise is frivolous? Of course not. What this means is that in order to maximize your weight loss, you must increase your BMA (your resting metabolic rate). This is done by creating more muscle. For every pound of muscle you build your body burns an additional 50 calories. So let's say you create 6 pounds of muscle, your body is burning 300 more calories in order to feed that muscle...and that's while you're sitting on your butt! So does this mean you should cut out cardio and head straight to the weight machines? Not so much...everything in moderation people! The thing about aerobic exercises is this....it doesn't create muscle. Thus, you are only burning calories while you are exercising, not while you are resting. And after about 20 minutes of cardio, your body begins to burn not only fat tissue but muscle tissue as well, becoming slightly counter productive. Running is a great form of cardio (my favorite actually) and will help you to quickly shed poundage. But if your goal is for long term leanness, then weight training is essential to your workout regiment.

2. Protein, Protein, Protein (its not just for your hair)
Your body is actually a food snob. It favors some food over others for the silliest reasons such as where it is located on the food chain. Ok, that was only slightly a joke. But really, "between 10 and 30 percent of the calories you burn each day get burned by the simple act of digesting your food. But not all food is the same. Your body actually uses more calories to digest protein (about 25 calories burned for every 100 calories consumed) that it does to digest fats and carbohydrates (10 to 15 calories burned for every 100 calories consumed)." The Abs Diet For Women. Moreover, protein is essential to building muscle. So lean protein (such as fish, chicken, turkey, etc.) actually pack a double whammy.....you burn more calories digesting it than most other foods AND you build muscle which will in turn burn more calories. Now that's hot!

3. God created two-a-days for a reason
Its the same reason why all diets suggest eating smaller portions more often throughout the day....working out more than once a day means you rev up your metabolism more than once a day. Think about it like this...when you drive to pick up a friend, do you drive to their house, turn the car off, jump right back in the car, and then turn the car back on? No....of course not. Why? Because the act of turning the ignition on, then off, then on again uses more gas than if you allow the ignition to stay on the first time. The same concept applies to exercise. Revving your body up to run for 20 minutes in the morning and then doing it again in the evening will make you burn more calories than running for 40 minutes straight one time (and prevents the burning of valuable muscle tissue...see #1). So break up your workouts into two-a-days. Even if you can only do 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes after dinner...you will notice a huge difference in your weight loss as your body benefits from the extra metabolism boost!

4. Whey Protein will make you P.H.A.T
Ok, I'm on a roll tonight with the corny jokes, but in spite of that, its true. Whey protein is a great addition to your diet. Whey protein (typically found in Whole Foods or Trader's Joe's) is a type of animal protein that supports muscle building. I already stated the benefits of protein earlier, but whey protein is an extra special protein because it packs the most essential amino acids and the highest amount of protein for the fewest calories. I typically put about 2 scoops of whey protein in my smoothies before every workout. This is because a "2001 study at the University of Texas found that people who drank a shake containing amino acids and carbohydrates before working out increased their protein synthesis (their ability to build muscle) more than those who drank the same shake after exercising." Abs Diet for Women.

5. Read food labels carefully....
Typically we have been trained to look for things that are low fat and low calorie. Well, that's not all we need to be concerned with. In order to succeed on your weight loss journey (and not be miserably famished the entire time) you need to incorporate foods that are naturally high in fiber, high in protein, low in sodium, and low in sugar. Ok so I know some people read this and their eyes glazed over like, boooo...sounds like a doctor's report. Well, it helped me to know the reason why, maybe it will help you too: Fiber & protein help you to feel full longer (think of it as shopping at Sam's Club vs. Giant...you get more bang for your buck). So while a cheeseburger may have the same amount of calories as baked chicken and a cup of broccoli, an hour after eating that cheeseburger you'll be hungry again. However, the chicken and broccoli, due to their high protein and high fiber content will keep you satisfied well into your next meal and prevent mindless snacking. Moreover, foods high in sodium will make you retain water as your body attempts to flush all the salt out of the arteries....so....you'll look fatter than you really are. Kind of like walking around with one of those circus mirrors attached to your body....now that's just not a good look for anyone, is it? A diet high in sugar, specifically high fructose corn syrup, will actually MAKE you hungry. High fructose corn syrup increases your appetite. It shuts off your body's natural appetite control so you can eat and eat and eat way beyond your body's normal capacity. High fructose corn syrup is the villain. I'll say it again: HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP IS THE VILLAIN TO YOUR WEIGHT LOSS! Steer clear and read those labels carefully!

**********Can't remember the nutritional information for your favorite fast food spot or chain restaurant , no problem. Technology is a beautiful thing. Click here and find out how you can text your query and find out the nutritional content of your favorite indulgences.*******************

That's it for now...stay tuned for more inspirational posts for a successful weight loss/get fit journey! Read More......

I despise grocery shopping. Seriously, I can get by on Cap N Crunch Crunch berries and Red Kool-Aid mixed with ginger ale for the rest of my life. However when I do go shopping I like to check out one spot...Whole Foods. As a single man, I must say that you will find the most attractive women at Whole Foods. Shameless plug, I know but I have to call it like I see it. Plus they have free wireless. I digress, sorry. Anyway, Whole Foods is a supermarket with fresh produce, meat and fish counters, canned goods, a bakery, a deli, and wine in many of their stores. Here is the thing about Whole Foods: you either love it or hate it.

As an MBA student I have come up with the following equation to help you with your shopping experience and here it is: Whole Foods = Whole Paycheck.

When I was young my first summer job was working at Krogers. Whole Foods is not a Krogers. It’s better. In fact it’s better than Publix, Giant, etc. Grant it that Whole Foods = Whole Paycheck, I like to call it the Pottery Barn of supermarkets. I mean in some cultures Whole Foods has replaced churches and cathedrals as the most important and relevant buildings in the community. It’s like the United Nations right in the inner city. Okay enough with the CHR monologue.

Whole Foods is a food retailer of "natural" and organic products including produce, seafood, grocery, meat and poultry, bakery, prepared foods and catering, beer, wine, cheese, whole body, floral, pet products, and household products. “What is the difference between organic and natural food?” Many people think that there is no difference between the two and both mean the same. But this is not true. If you compare organic and natural from their definitions, the difference will be clear.

Organic food refers to food items that are produced, manufactured and handled using organic means defined by certifying bodies such as the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) under its Organic Food Products Act. Natural food, on the other hand, generally refers to food items that are not altered chemically or synthesized in any form. These are derived from plants and animals. Thus a natural food item is not necessarily organic and vice versa.

But the important question is - "Why do some people prefer organic food and some people prefer natural food?" This is because some people have the belief that synthesizing a food item results in loss of its nutrients and properties. Hence they demand natural foods. Organic food fans, on the other hand, want their food to be free of chemical fertilizers, pesticides and preservatives.

Besides food, at Whole Foods you are fortunate to witness an outrageously large section of vitamins, supplements, and natural oils. There are natural, handmade soaps which give these stores a unique and uniform smell. It's the kind of place that makes you feel like you need to change your whole lifestyle — for the better, mostly — just to sync up with it.

Perhaps you doubt these words. Perhaps you are like: Oh please, enough about Whole Foods already, it's just a ridiculously expensive grocery store that deserves its "Whole Paycheck" nickname for how effortlessly it drains your bank account and feeds your buppie ego and shuts out the poor, just a high concept pseudo-liberal cultural irritant that actively excludes a huge segment of the populace that simply can't afford its massive markup on hothouse cucumbers and organic muffins and whipped chocolate tofu. Sneer and hiss and moan.

I mean lawd jayzus. Merely skimming the company's own press releases, reading up on its various foundations, its commitment to transparency in how it does business and the issues it faces as a so-called "do-gooder" company, its current No. 5 ranking in the Forbes list of the 100 best companies to work for, its surprisingly progressive positions on supporting local farmers and promoting sustainability, commitment to community, its overall dedication to minimizing chemicals and additives, well, it's tough not to sit back and go: Wait, if they can do it, why the can't this be the way of American business overall?

In CHR words, I don't care that Whole Foods isn't for everyone. I don't care if you think it's unbearably snooty or subconsciously pretentious or that it caters only to a certain upscale clientele or that you can't buy giant bags of Doritos and four-gallon drums of Cherry Coke there. Blind cynicism, in this case, is just way too easy.

Curse Whole Foods' apparently genuine concern for the quality of your entire food experience all you want. The bottom line is fairly irrefutable: We should fall on our all-American gluttonous knees right this minute in a devout collective wish, a giant wail of hope that more corporations follow in Whole Foods' footsteps.

Whole Foods' success has forced such stores as Giant, Krogers, and Publix to redesign their stores and soften their brutal lighting and improve the quality of their offerings, as they add organic produce and healthy food aisles and even rethink their business ethos by actually becoming a bit more accountable to their customers. Sweet baby jayzus, how horrible.

Did I mention the women?

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Girl...whats your number. Brotha here's my number...whats yours?

No P.O.S.H. isnt trying to holla, holla, holla atcha. We need to educate ourselves on the silent killer called blood pressure.

Blood pressure is how your blood is circulated through your blood vessels and is one of the principal vital signs. Your blood pressure is directly affected by stress , nutritional factors, drug use, or disease.

High blood pressure is also referred to as hypertension. High blood pressure directly increases your chances of having a heart attack, heart failure, stroke, kidney disease, and other life-threatening illnesses. Pre hypertension begins at 120-29 over 80-89. High blood pressure begins at 140/90.

Optimal blood pressure for a healthy American is 120 over 80; however the average American's blood pressure is 130 over 85 and the average American dies of a heart attack. Your mamma told you not to be average. Here is why.

Little known fact:
African-Americans have higher blood pressure because when Africans were taken as slaves across the Middle Passage, the African Americans who survived were the ones who could hold more salt in their bodies. Those who perished were those who could not hold that high salt content in their bodies.

So the very thing which "saved us" is now causing our deaths. African Americans are most likely to develop high blood pressure than any other racial or ethnic group.

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